Alternatively.

You guys want an honest letter for a rejected submission?

You bet:

Hi,

We didn’t ask for this, and it’s not good. We don’t want to publish it. Stop sending things. Seriously.

Us.

Or, of course, you could do what Exquisite Corpse used to do: post a list of the names of every submitter who should a) try again later or b) never ever send anything again. Talk about honest.1

No, it’s not nice. But it is honest. And personal. Ish.

I mean do you guys respond to every piece of unrequested information you’ve ever received with a personal note? Newsletters, ads, and spam, too? Really, you don’t? Wow. Callous. Poor caddying.

Seriously, I don’t understand writers who get all butt-hurt about rejections. It’s like yelling at rain or gravity. It just is.

It’s not your fucking allowance, guys. It’s business. Keep writing, keep submitting, paper your walls, and cowboy up forever. The only person who owes you anything is you. Maybe. If you’re lucky.

  1. Exquisite Corpse. Addendum (2009-10-29 05:35:13 -0700). Google reminds me that Exquisite Corpse’s infamous rejection feature was called, “The Body Bag.” Dark horse, that Andrei Codrescu. ↩

70 Notes/ Hide

  1. rokku reblogged this from merlin and added:
    (2009-10-29 05:35:13...I can’t wait until I’m getting rejection letters, because that...
  2. steampoweredmedia reblogged this from merlin and added:
    A friend of mine and I had a contest last year to see who could amass the most...letters....
  3. samuelhansen reblogged this from merlin and added:
    I have sent in a few stories and poems for publication and I have to say...many times I...
  4. markjlove reblogged this from merlin
  5. kabillieu reblogged this from merlin and added:
    I could stand to be reminded about this. Indefinitely.